Every time when I write you a letter, I am acutely aware that they never reach you, but some things in life we don’t wanna accept. Sometimes I do wonder where you have gone, sometimes I try to look into distant trees or the faraway houses, as far my eyes could reach, hoping that somewhere down the line you might be waiting for my letter, even when the gloomiest of gloomy day hit me,I think of the moments we had with each other, into the unreachable past, veiled in the cloud of years. Years ago, it was a quiet Saturday night like this, your body was wrapped into the wires of machines. I couldn’t look into those pale, white face, and I remember looking at the blank sky above and thinking about how would I tell you to make my favorite dish once you are cured and safely back to my arms. But that day never came. Time may not have mended those agony but I do know maa, how day by day, moment by moment I become you. Fate is an uncanny thing, why does it takes missing to know how much loving we are capable off. Maybe that’s the way of the world, I wish I would have said you aloud of how much you meant to me. I was dumb, stupid and young, maybe still am.
But whatever these years may say, whether it’s 2555 days, I love you as deeply and sincerely and no shackles of time can demolish that love,it can snatch you from me but it cannot and will not ever detach you from me. In every sadness to happiness and those tiny insignificant moments,I remember your laugh and your love and that is what makes me. My whole life is built from you and you are the foundation of my very being.
As the years turn into dusts,I am thankful for the time I have got to spend with you, from our trips to my ceaseless dance program’s to pujo gatherings, I am the luckiest to spend those moments. Maybe after years of blaming, I have found the acceptance to not hold you back anymore.
I don’t want to know where you are, wherever you are I hope that you are away from that sick disease that stripped all the light from your eyes, and I don’t look for stars.I don’t believe you are that far way from me. Whenever I miss you, I look into my heart and there a sun dappled smile I can always hear, who said you have left?
You are my forever sunshine.